It's all in the beautiful game

The countdown to the world cup is drawing ever closer and those famous words 'come on england' will be singing from every rooftop, living room and public house in the land.

But spare a thought a moment my friends! or should i say spare a thought for the girlfriends, wives or mistresses every where. Since we are living in a world of upside down topsy turvy gender reversals, perhaps women will shouting harder than the men - but, there are still a handful of women i know,  who wont be remotely interested in how england do in the tournament.

If you are married to one of these, or are in a relationship i urge you to take them out for a slap up meal and butter them up before she has to be subjected to a full month or so of sheer constant banter about the state of the team and not to mention ROONEY's metatarsal.

Perhaps it would be cheaper to send them off to a luxury health hotel for a month so you can put your feet up sipping ice cold bud and invite your 'mates' around to watch the footie.

You have been warned this is a party political broadcast to all ego tripping males out there.

Sven - the state of the nation lies in your capable hands!